Missing

Yeah, I can't find Bawal's necklace (the USB) so I can't upload any picture tsk tsk. Anyway, my friend (Matthew) gave me a piece of mind about something.

Nobody would be happy living in my future but myself.

True, definitely. That got me thinking. Yeah, about every single decision I've been making, or will be, or whatever, they will effect my future. For now, so far, my conflict is over.

Yeah, I've got blessings from both my grandparents to go on this DiGi Live Advertisement Commercial, both my parents, and even my lecturers. I went to Melaka just now to settle a few things, and Alhamdulillah, things went according to plan.

Yes, I'm taking a semester off, and boy, it's for my own good. I need to restructure everything. Even my coordinator said that it's better if I take this extra holiday because he don't want me to regret anything in the future, plus if I go back there after the whole tour thing, I'm going to miss alot of things, and I might fail a few subjects, so why bother? I'd still have to repeat them, no? Yes, of course everybody wants me to finish my studies as fast as I can, but really, offers like this doesn't come rolling on my door everyday.

The 4 hours drive (back and forth) I had with my parents, was shocking. I never thought I could actually talk to them properly. I finally told them about my singing thing, and they know it's something that I don't want to do professionally, because its more like, a huge passion, but never a dream. Then again, just because its bluntly passion, I can't let others take for granted on me. Singing for free, thats not the way. I know. But sometimes, you just can't run away from it. I'm stuck in the middle.

About my singing line, I've heard a lot of stories from so many mouths. Some are true, some aren't. I've heard about those who's trying to ; a. pull me away from this industry, and b. trying to pull me in a little further, while c. trying to make me look stupid, and d. trying to manipulate things and steal me away from other people.

"If its plain passion, why are you doing it seriously? Get back to reality and go study,"

- situation A.

"You should join us, really, we've been doing a lot of things for you, so this is the time,"

- situation B.

"Why are you so stupid? You should stop singing there, they don't pay you,"

- situation C

"Don't go to them, I heard that they want you because you can make money for them,"

- situation D.

Then again, decisions are always wrong. You can never decide and make the right decision. Whatever decision you make will have their pros, and cons. Same thing goes to me. I make decisions, and I pray for it to go well. About me taking a semester off, it took me few sleepless nights to really decide about what to do and all. Yes, I might've said yes to the tour earlier, but the drive for me to finish my course on time is still there.

"Ain, are you sure about this? Aw I won't be seeing you on Graduation Night, then,"

- course mate A

"Gahh you'll be studying with the juniors, and I won't come back here (Melaka) to see you,"

- course mate B

" Who's gonna call me and say 'I WANT TO TUMPANG YOU HOMEEE' now?"

- course mate C

Guys, I love you people man. BUT IT'S JUST A SEMESTER OFF, and you guys are like, 4 months ahead of me, that's all. Please understand. My CV will look good, and job opportunity for me in the future is broad. I need that.

Please respect my decision. It was hard enough for me to convince my grandparents, so I hope you guys will understand. My emo mode is still on, although my semester leave's approved by my coordinator, but whatever my coursemate said made me heavy hearted to leave.

So really, guys. Please understand. Thanks to those who does. You guys are my back bone. Seriously. Ira, thank you very much. I can't thank you more.

Ok I nak sambung emo la ok.