shamoo

Hm, yes. I don't know. Why? Oh no. Maybe not. Oh really? Okay, maybe yes. No I don't think so. What do you think? I miss you. Yes I do.

Hey to all the non believers. I think it's time for you guys to know that. I am. Crazy. Sick in the head. Mentally distorted. I don't know.

I was talking to Ira just now. And suddenly she pointed something out. Something that can make another thing stop working and functioning properly. What? Oh. Nothing much. Its just that. I am a..

Extremist.

One point, I will go out with someone everyday. Without fail. We talk, we have mutual understanding, we laugh together. Do almost everything together. I enjoyed his/her company. I want to be with them. It feels as though they understand every single thing about me, and just by staring at that person, they can interprete your look into something understandable.

But then, that will last for just a few good moment. Why? I will start growing out of it. I will have this boredom feeling, like, this person is boring me. And everything that he/she does will seem annoyingly annoying. Although they didn't do anything annoying. I will start finding faults and the excitement feeling I always felt whenever I see the person will vanish in a few quick second.

Okay, for instance, right now, Farah and Nira. They've been spending quite some time with us. I really really like their company. Like super duper la. I like to talk to Kak Chik. Hahah. I mean, really. She makes me feel like a pampered little sister who's always annoying. Like, you know? How a normal little sister should behave? But she put up with my nonsense and make me smile and put a brave face for me. You know how penakut I can be, right. With all those shits that's been happening. To make things worse, they came at the right time.

I like having them around. But I'm afraid of ruining the whole thing. I don't want to have this boring feeling. It sicken the shit out of me. I don't want it to go to the extend where I do not know what to talk about with them, or feel fucked up when they're around, find every faults they don't even have? Grrr.

See? I am easily bored, and I grew out of things pretty fast. Was it because of my past? Or is it because I am just too damn fucked up?

So now, there's only one thing that I'm scared of.